I've been working on the Spanish hard this week. With two days off of school, I've got the time. Yesterday, I finished the last lesson of 80 in the Coffee Break Spanish podcasts. Yes, 80 lessons. (Although I confess to skipping 1–9 as they were way, way too easy.) That's 26 full hours of Spanish-learning podcasts. And I was all ready to feel this great sense of accomplishment - and then, in the last lesson, they began touting their next series of 40 lessons, called Showtime Spanish, that picks up where Coffee Break left off.
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm glad to have more lessons, and hopefully, these will be more appropriate for my level. But still. There's no sense of accomplishment when you realize that you still have a TON more to learn.
It's kind of like parenting, or teaching, I guess. No matter how hard you work, how much time you devote, your work is never truly done. And while that's exciting (when I'm in the right frame of mind), it's also sobering (when I'm in the wrong frame of mind).
I guess you just have to take the little successes and remind yourself of those. For example, I wrote a really long essay - my longest yet, about 5 pages - and just got it back from the bilingual kindergarten teacher who was kind enough to correct it for me. So, either her Spanish is not as good as other's who have corrected me, or I've gotten a lot better, because she had very few corrections for me. So, yay me!
Friday, February 25, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
What a week in Wisconsin!
I must interrupt my normal train of thought on this blog to discuss what's been happening this week in Wisconsin. A few days after my last post, our new Republican governor, Scott Walker, unveiled his plan to eliminate collective bargaining rights for nearly all public employees - including teachers. He tried to have this new legislation pushed through the Senate and Assembly in two days time. Massive protests at the capitol here in Madison have ensued, and the Democratic senators had no choice but to flee the state in order not to have a quorum present for voting. The number of protesters has grown daily, beginning with some 10,000 and reaching 70,000 6 days later. All public employee unions have gone on record with Walker stating they will not oppose the cut in health insurance and pension benefits also proposed (our family will begin losing $400/month as soon as this takes effect, as my husband works for the state), but he still flatly refuses to negotiate ANYTHING about killing collective bargaining rights as well. No one knows how this will all end, but now all the country is watching and waiting...
So, in the schools this week, it has been extremely depressing. People are worried about their money and their jobs, yes, but more so, teachers are worried about not having any kind of voice in their schools. They're worried about enormous class sizes, cuts in useful programs, cuts in support positions that directly benefit kids. And even though many have been to the capitol and participated in what has been described as an amazingly energizing, supportive environment, when they're at the schools, there are tears in their eyes on and off through the day.
So, it's pretty obvious which side of the debate I fall on politically. On a personal level, my feelings are just as strong. I've taught in an environment where there is no money, no support, huge classes. It was awful. The thought of doing so again makes me want to run away screaming. The stress was enormous. I don't think it's something I could do and be a good mom.
Further, one of the things I hated about teaching was the feeling that teachers were always being shat upon in one way, or in ten others. And this new legislation is unarguably the biggest load of shit being dumped yet. Why would I want to re-join a profession where people are treated in such a way?!?
And yet, it's what I am trained for, it's what I am sinking $5000 into to be trained better for even as I write this. And I need a job. So what am I supposed to do? What are we all supposed to do?
And worst of all, if this legislation can pass, and most assume it will, what's next? I know Walker's gone on record saying he'll support legislation like Arizona has against latinos. Not only is he going after my school, he'd like to go after the kids in my classes!
Madre de Dios.
So, in the schools this week, it has been extremely depressing. People are worried about their money and their jobs, yes, but more so, teachers are worried about not having any kind of voice in their schools. They're worried about enormous class sizes, cuts in useful programs, cuts in support positions that directly benefit kids. And even though many have been to the capitol and participated in what has been described as an amazingly energizing, supportive environment, when they're at the schools, there are tears in their eyes on and off through the day.
So, it's pretty obvious which side of the debate I fall on politically. On a personal level, my feelings are just as strong. I've taught in an environment where there is no money, no support, huge classes. It was awful. The thought of doing so again makes me want to run away screaming. The stress was enormous. I don't think it's something I could do and be a good mom.
Further, one of the things I hated about teaching was the feeling that teachers were always being shat upon in one way, or in ten others. And this new legislation is unarguably the biggest load of shit being dumped yet. Why would I want to re-join a profession where people are treated in such a way?!?
And yet, it's what I am trained for, it's what I am sinking $5000 into to be trained better for even as I write this. And I need a job. So what am I supposed to do? What are we all supposed to do?
And worst of all, if this legislation can pass, and most assume it will, what's next? I know Walker's gone on record saying he'll support legislation like Arizona has against latinos. Not only is he going after my school, he'd like to go after the kids in my classes!
Madre de Dios.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Discouragement
I've been spending a lot of my days student teaching lately, mostly speaking in English. In fact, in the past two weeks, I've only taught for one half day in Spanish. And guess what? Today, when I subbed for a kindergarten class in Spanish, I totally sucked. (Pardon the non-teacher language.) I couldn't even understand what some of them were saying! Now granted, kindergarteners can be very random and hard to understand, but seriously?!? And when I spoke, I was making all kinds of weird mistakes - things I haven't done for quite a while.
SO FRUSTRATING!!!
I have applied for a long-term bilingual grade 1 sub position, and interviewed for it last week. I still haven't heard anything, but I don't have a good feeling about my chances. And after today, maybe that's for the best. Maybe teaching in Spanish is just too darn hard for me. Maybe teaching in English is plenty hard enough. Maybe I just need to give up on the whole bilingual license idea...
SO FRUSTRATING!!!
I have applied for a long-term bilingual grade 1 sub position, and interviewed for it last week. I still haven't heard anything, but I don't have a good feeling about my chances. And after today, maybe that's for the best. Maybe teaching in Spanish is just too darn hard for me. Maybe teaching in English is plenty hard enough. Maybe I just need to give up on the whole bilingual license idea...
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Writing and more writing
So, I'm in the middle of my student teaching for my ESL license. I was hoping to do more of my teaching in Spanish, but as I've chosen to teach about African folktales for Social Studies, and all the folktales I can get my hands on are in English, I'm having to teach in English. And, even though I seem to be code-switching very naturally, I've noticed that my cooperating teacher sticks to just one language at a time. When I asked her if this was deliberate, she said it was, which means I have to stop myself from randomly speaking in Spanish during teaching.
And so, I have been doing a lot of writing in Spanish instead. I have written a lot of essays, and various communications home that I have asked just about every Spanish-speaking adult in school to correct for me. No one has the time to sit down with me and discuss what I write, but I do get to see comments and corrections. I do feel like my writing has improved since the beginning of January, when I first took the Written Proficiency Test through ACTFL. I am trying to focus on writing in Spanish like I do in English - not limiting myself to writing what I know I can write correctly, because then, my writing sounds like that of a 5th grader. I know I need to repeat less, construct more complex sentences, and use better conjunctions and connecting phrases to make my writing sound more sophisticated. And one of the things that I'm finding is that I need to learn what those phrases, or ways of saying things, are in Spanish. After I learn what they are, I just need to memorize them. For example, in English, we say "That's Greek to me." In Spanish, the saying is "That's Chinese to me." There are many ways of phrasing things in English that are not possible, or simply not done in Spanish. I need the replacement phrases to make my writing more authentic, less choppy. And that's something that is going to come slowly...
And so, I have been doing a lot of writing in Spanish instead. I have written a lot of essays, and various communications home that I have asked just about every Spanish-speaking adult in school to correct for me. No one has the time to sit down with me and discuss what I write, but I do get to see comments and corrections. I do feel like my writing has improved since the beginning of January, when I first took the Written Proficiency Test through ACTFL. I am trying to focus on writing in Spanish like I do in English - not limiting myself to writing what I know I can write correctly, because then, my writing sounds like that of a 5th grader. I know I need to repeat less, construct more complex sentences, and use better conjunctions and connecting phrases to make my writing sound more sophisticated. And one of the things that I'm finding is that I need to learn what those phrases, or ways of saying things, are in Spanish. After I learn what they are, I just need to memorize them. For example, in English, we say "That's Greek to me." In Spanish, the saying is "That's Chinese to me." There are many ways of phrasing things in English that are not possible, or simply not done in Spanish. I need the replacement phrases to make my writing more authentic, less choppy. And that's something that is going to come slowly...
Monday, February 7, 2011
And she is slowly dragged under...
Ok, so not that this has anything to do with learning Spanish, but it does have to do with student teaching. Between subbing quite a few days in February, student teaching, learning Spanish and being a mom to 3 young girls, I am feeling a wee bit overwhelmed. I knew February was going to be hard.
Back to learning Spanish. So, I've been subbing in bilingual classrooms. Kindergarten is by far the hardest. I have a kindergartener of my own, and let me tell you, sometimes even I don't understand her. Her thoughts sometimes come out of the blue with absolutely no context attached. She hasn't mastered the "r" sound yet, which can make it hard for other people to understand her. Add to these issues, the language barrier, and I am sometimes at a loss for understanding them. On the other hand, third graders are delightfully easy to understand. We can code-switch constantly and understand each other with near perfection. If I ask what something means, they can tell me, either in English, or by explaining in Spanish. The younger kids don't know how to do that - they can't really understand that I need their help to know what they are saying. It's an interesting developmental difference. In Kindergarten and first grade, everything is done in Spanish, only occasional directions are given in English, and maybe 5 to 10 minutes of basic routines (the calendar and the like). So, my use of Spanish is nearly constant.
Interestingly, I have found that no matter what grade I am teaching, my Spanish is MUCH more fluent by the afternoon than it is in the morning. By the afternoon, I feel like I can say nearly anything I want to, almost without thinking. If I'm not consciously monitoring myself, my thoughts are more likely to come out in English in the mornings.
I also notice how very tired I am after a day with the youngest kids. Not only because they are less self-sufficient, but because of my greater use of Spanish throughout the day. Those are the days when I come home that my brain insists on continuing to think in Spanish all the way until bedtime. And even then, I often have trouble falling asleep because particular phrases from the day are circling around in my head. By the time I wake the next morning, the effect is gone. I know it means good things are happening to be thinking in my second language, but honestly, it's annoying. I wish I could turn it off when I want to. The kids likely feel the same, but have less understanding and knowledge of the process of language learning. I wonder if anyone ever talks to them about all this...
Back to learning Spanish. So, I've been subbing in bilingual classrooms. Kindergarten is by far the hardest. I have a kindergartener of my own, and let me tell you, sometimes even I don't understand her. Her thoughts sometimes come out of the blue with absolutely no context attached. She hasn't mastered the "r" sound yet, which can make it hard for other people to understand her. Add to these issues, the language barrier, and I am sometimes at a loss for understanding them. On the other hand, third graders are delightfully easy to understand. We can code-switch constantly and understand each other with near perfection. If I ask what something means, they can tell me, either in English, or by explaining in Spanish. The younger kids don't know how to do that - they can't really understand that I need their help to know what they are saying. It's an interesting developmental difference. In Kindergarten and first grade, everything is done in Spanish, only occasional directions are given in English, and maybe 5 to 10 minutes of basic routines (the calendar and the like). So, my use of Spanish is nearly constant.
Interestingly, I have found that no matter what grade I am teaching, my Spanish is MUCH more fluent by the afternoon than it is in the morning. By the afternoon, I feel like I can say nearly anything I want to, almost without thinking. If I'm not consciously monitoring myself, my thoughts are more likely to come out in English in the mornings.
I also notice how very tired I am after a day with the youngest kids. Not only because they are less self-sufficient, but because of my greater use of Spanish throughout the day. Those are the days when I come home that my brain insists on continuing to think in Spanish all the way until bedtime. And even then, I often have trouble falling asleep because particular phrases from the day are circling around in my head. By the time I wake the next morning, the effect is gone. I know it means good things are happening to be thinking in my second language, but honestly, it's annoying. I wish I could turn it off when I want to. The kids likely feel the same, but have less understanding and knowledge of the process of language learning. I wonder if anyone ever talks to them about all this...
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Here we go!
Well, I'm still trying to figure out how to edit my first post "blah blah" which was only meant to see if this thing called a blog was working. I'm finding out that as I re-enter the teaching world 11 years after leaving it, that technology is one of the biggest hurdles I have to overcome, the other being...
Spanish!
So, to give you a bit of background here, I was a teacher for four years outside of Washington, D.C. The school I taught at had 700 students, grades K–6, and was the "International School" for our district, which meant all ELL's went to our school. Spanish was the predominant first language, but there were a lot of others in there too. There were 2 ESL teachers for the whole school. Only one was fluent in Spanish. After her, I was the next most fluent adult at the school - which wasn't very fluent at all. I did what I could, but as a classroom teacher with 25–30 first graders of my own (and no aides or volunteers), that wasn't much. I could occasionally translate, but even at my own conferences, the children often had to act as translators for their parents. At least, I could tell that what they were saying was what I had said...
After my first daughter, and then my second and third daughters, was born, I quit my job, moved to Madison and stayed home with them for the past 11 years. Now that my youngest is in kindergarten, it's time for me to head back to work. To get certified to teach in WI, I had to take 6 credits. So, I began looking around for something good, and I found the ESL/bilingual program at Edgewood College. I took my 6 credits this past summer, loved the program, remembered how much I love Spanish, realized that I need to be able to speak, read, write and understand it, and began studying it.
I took Spanish all through high school, and into a semester of college to get those retroactive credits. Then, tired of it, and wanting a new challenge, I switched to French and took that for 3 semesters. Biggest mistake of my academic career. While I loved French, it completely messed up my Spanish, and by not using the Spanish, I lost most of it.
So, upon beginning to re-learn it this summer, I was very happy to discover that it was still in my brain somewhere, hiding. Things were coming back pretty easily, and then, school started for the year. My plan for this year was to substitute in Verona, where we live and my kids go to school, while finishing my ESL license. I wanted a bit of flexibility to be able to help out in my daughter's kindergarten class, as I did for my other two daughters, and also some flexibility to study for classes. (I was also hoping to continue to freelance for an educational publisher, but that's another long story...)
Nearly all of my jobs as a substitute this year have been in Verona's K–3 bilingual classrooms. I've been working typically 3 or 4 days a week, and teaching in Spanish while doing so. The experience has been amazing, and amazingly difficult, and my Spanish has improved greatly. But more on that in the next post...
Spanish!
So, to give you a bit of background here, I was a teacher for four years outside of Washington, D.C. The school I taught at had 700 students, grades K–6, and was the "International School" for our district, which meant all ELL's went to our school. Spanish was the predominant first language, but there were a lot of others in there too. There were 2 ESL teachers for the whole school. Only one was fluent in Spanish. After her, I was the next most fluent adult at the school - which wasn't very fluent at all. I did what I could, but as a classroom teacher with 25–30 first graders of my own (and no aides or volunteers), that wasn't much. I could occasionally translate, but even at my own conferences, the children often had to act as translators for their parents. At least, I could tell that what they were saying was what I had said...
After my first daughter, and then my second and third daughters, was born, I quit my job, moved to Madison and stayed home with them for the past 11 years. Now that my youngest is in kindergarten, it's time for me to head back to work. To get certified to teach in WI, I had to take 6 credits. So, I began looking around for something good, and I found the ESL/bilingual program at Edgewood College. I took my 6 credits this past summer, loved the program, remembered how much I love Spanish, realized that I need to be able to speak, read, write and understand it, and began studying it.
I took Spanish all through high school, and into a semester of college to get those retroactive credits. Then, tired of it, and wanting a new challenge, I switched to French and took that for 3 semesters. Biggest mistake of my academic career. While I loved French, it completely messed up my Spanish, and by not using the Spanish, I lost most of it.
So, upon beginning to re-learn it this summer, I was very happy to discover that it was still in my brain somewhere, hiding. Things were coming back pretty easily, and then, school started for the year. My plan for this year was to substitute in Verona, where we live and my kids go to school, while finishing my ESL license. I wanted a bit of flexibility to be able to help out in my daughter's kindergarten class, as I did for my other two daughters, and also some flexibility to study for classes. (I was also hoping to continue to freelance for an educational publisher, but that's another long story...)
Nearly all of my jobs as a substitute this year have been in Verona's K–3 bilingual classrooms. I've been working typically 3 or 4 days a week, and teaching in Spanish while doing so. The experience has been amazing, and amazingly difficult, and my Spanish has improved greatly. But more on that in the next post...
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